My daughter’s 9th Grade class just finished reading Romeo & Juliet. In a recent class assignment, my daughter and her classmates were given this question: What are the top five qualities you are looking for in a ‘perfect’ mate? I’m sure getting her students to think ‘mushy’ feelings was a little challenging for my daughter’s English teacher!
They were then given a second question: What are the top five qualities you think your parents would want for your ‘perfect’ mate? Again, probably challenging for the young minds, especially since we don’t want them dating at a young age let alone thinking about marriage at age 14!
The students were then given homework: Ask your parents the following questions:
- List the top five qualities that you think your son or daughter would want in a ‘perfect’ mate.
- List the top five qualities you want in a ‘perfect’ mate for your son or daughter.
When my daughter got in the car after school that day, she was excited that Mom & Dad had homework. But as she described the assignment, I knew that those questions would make for excellent dinner table conversation.
Fast forward a few hours…
We’re seated at the table (my husband, our 17-yr old son, our daughter and I) and my daughter pulls out her questionnaire. Mind you, I had a slight advantage over my husband – I had a few hours to ponder the questions while my husband had 2 minutes. I wish you could have seen his facial expression. 🙂
Question #1: List the top five qualities that you think your son or daughter would want in a ‘perfect’ mate.
Hmm…what would Kennedy want in a perfect mate? Knowing our daughter’s personality, it was surprisingly easy for both my husband and I to answer this question. My husband gave his top five and I followed with mine. We know our daughter pretty well – we both scored 4 out of 5. Not bad!
Question #2: List the top five qualities you want in a ‘perfect’ mate for your son or daughter.
This question was a little more personal as this would reveal more of our heart. Again, my husband went first and I followed. What i found interesting was that my husband’s responses were more ‘selfish’ – meaning that he listed qualities for someone who HE’D like to get along with. My responses, on the other hand, were more for the man my daughter (and Lord-willing, grandchildren) would love and live with.
I love that this assignment provided us with some good table talk but it also got me thinking – How often do I pray for my children’s future spouses? Honestly, not often enough. And that was convicting for me.
As a mom, I pray many things for my children..
…that they would love God first and most
…that they would live God-honoring lives and make wise choices
…that they would have friends with similar values
…for their overall safety in an unsafe, dangerous world
…that they would treat others the way that they want to be treated
…and many other things too numerous for me to mention.
But praying for their future spouse? Not something that I regularly prayed for – until recently.
If you feel so led, do this exercise with your family and see what conversation emerges as a result. You’ll get to know your child’s heart a little better and they’ll get a peek inside of yours. And you might have a few good laughs like we did!
*Disclaimer: My daughter attends a Christian school, so that’s the angle that the assignment was taken from.
What about you? Do you pray regularly for your child’s future spouse? What do you pray for?